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 Author | Topic: Which Was Worse? - Part 2 (Read 675 times) |
Chest Rockwell
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DeathSurge
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|  | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #1 on Oct 16, 2006, 9:00am » | |
Easy one for me: "Godzilla". Besides being one dimensional, the characters in that film were down right annoying. I was rooting for Godzilla to kill everyone of them. And you hit the proveriable nail on the head on the kills. Give me Godzilla stomping on a crowded times square in the middle of the day, not an abandoned city knocking down buildings at night.
Additionally, while the CGI was respectable, no one paid any attention to scale from scene to scene. Godzilla went from the size of a sky scraper to his foot being only a couple of carlengths. Detecting it's variance became my only entertainment in the film. And let's not forget that this brilliant script had this towering lizard successfully win a game of "hide and seek". The large amount of alcohol I drank was not sufficient for me to ever buy that event.
Yes, "Van Helsing" had more bad CGI than any film before or since, but it also had Kate Beckinsdale in a corset. More importantly, it also never seemed to take itself that seriously. I was in the mood for mindless shlocky entertainment, and it delievered. Good film? Of course not, but no where near as bad as "Godzilla".
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #2 on Oct 16, 2006, 9:12am » | |
Sadly enough--or possibly not--I did not watch Godzilla for the fact that I didn't think it could be pulled off in the first place and I honestly did not give a shit about it.
However, I did watch Van Helsing and liked it (everyone shut up) only because I want to have Hugh Jackman's love child.
So there, this is my first official vote where I like a movie only because of a hot guy--and there will be more I am that girl--Godzilla sucks worse than Van Helsing.
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Brad
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #3 on Oct 16, 2006, 9:28am » | |
Godzilla never had some creepy fat chick insanely devoted to the main villain, so it's automatically a much better film.
Van Helsing wins, hands down. Utter excrement on every possible level.
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Werbal
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #4 on Oct 16, 2006, 9:34am » | |
VAN HELSING is so much worse. Godzilla is just boring and looks okay. VAN HELSING is actively excrutiating with each scene somehow being more retarded than the previous. And it looks totally fucking fake.
Also, Beckinsale's Cloudface.
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Doug
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #5 on Oct 16, 2006, 9:41am » | |
Now THIS is a toughie. Two movies that completely shit all over their beloved source material. Two movies that managed to take simple concepts and make them impenetrable. Two movies that somehow made monsters boring. Two movies that burnt fertile creative fields to the ground and spread salt over the barren plains so that no sequel could ever grow there again. Two movies that made life less worth living.
I guess I'll have to say Godzilla is the worse of the two. Because at the very least, as Andrew noted, Van Helsing has prevented Sommers from making another movie. And that's a good thing.
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Andrew
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #6 on Oct 16, 2006, 10:17am » | |
Brad is talking about Countess Anna here, by the way Ta. However creepy you may be, Countess Anna is the queen (possibly king) of creep. Bob's naked fat guy photos are nothing compared to Countess Anna pics, which shall not be reproduced here.
As for Kate Beckinsale, who is unbelievably hot - she gets knocked unconscious and wakes up in bed - still in her full action-figure corset and boots outfit. Inexcusable.
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Doug
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #7 on Oct 16, 2006, 10:24am » | |
I thought Brad was talking about Werbal.
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Alex
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #8 on Oct 16, 2006, 10:25am » | |
Is it fair to vote for a film that I've only watched up to a certain point? Van Helsing was so bad that I had to turn it off before it ended and lie down for a while. The fact that Dracula looked like a transsexual gypsy was a particular lowlight. Just a horrible, horrible film.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #9 on Oct 16, 2006, 10:59am » | |
Quote:Godzilla never had some creepy fat chick insanely devoted to the main villain, so it's automatically a much better film.
Van Helsing wins, hands down. Utter excrement on every possible level. |
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Is that directed towards me or the film??
EDIT: Thank you Andrew for clarifying. I would hate to have to kick Brad's ass!!
EDIT-2: And I'm only moderately creepy!
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Brad
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #10 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:01am » | |
Sorry, I should've clarified. I forget that not everyone here has been a part of the "Countess Anna Experience".
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Andrew
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #11 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:02am » | |
*shudders.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #12 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:02am » | |
Apology accepted.....this time!
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Andrew
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #13 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:06am » | |
I would pay to see Brad vs Ta though.
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DeathSurge
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #14 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:09am » | |
Quote:| Sorry, I should've clarified. I forget that not everyone here has been a part of the "Countess Anna Experience". |
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And thanks for bringing the memory of that picture of her back to the surface. Now I won't sleep tonight.
And I still think "she" is a guy.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #15 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:13am » | |
Quote:| I would pay to see Brad vs Ta though. |
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Which do you prefer..jello or mud??
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Andrew
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #16 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:14am » | |
Baked beans.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #17 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:15am » | |
Quote:
Quote:| Sorry, I should've clarified. I forget that not everyone here has been a part of the "Countess Anna Experience". |
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And thanks for bringing the memory of that picture of her back to the surface. Now I won't sleep tonight.
And I still think "she" is a guy.
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Again, we must clarify....I must be a tad bit touchy today.
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Brad
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #18 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:16am » | |
Countess Anna. You'd know if you'd seen the pictures.
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DeathSurge
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #19 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:20am » | |
Mr. Millette is correct. Sorry I didn't make that clearer.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #20 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:21am » | |
No it's my fault I took an extra dose of hormones today, I guess. But see to it that it does not happen again or I will have to release an estrogen rage on all of you and you will cry to your mommies!! Have a good day!
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Jon
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #21 on Oct 16, 2006, 11:41am » | |
Lets see.
Godzilla '98, giant size-changing CGI asexual lizard that lays eggs. Decent actor list, ho-hum effort for such an SFX heavy film.
Van Helsing, giant size-changing CGI asexual? (probably homosexual) Dracula, who lays dead eggs. Major selling point was the casting of Wolverine (snikt! lol bub.) turned out to be a major let down once you saw the damn movie. Total raping of the whole dracula and horror mythologies.
The worser film: Van Helsing, hands down.
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SUCK MAH BIG BLACK MISSILE DICK FAGS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -- Zealous Carlton. |
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #22 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:03pm » | |
I'm gonna have to go with Godzilla. The only reason might be because I enjoyed at least part of VH (mainly the automatic crossbow and the idea of an ecumenical monster fighting organization run by the Vatican) whereas not even my general liking of Broderick was enough to carry G. I hate that both movies put their monsters in a lead lined coffin for a while, but since Hollywood do love their remakes they aren't down for the count.
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Andrew
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #23 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:06pm » | |
I think this is four votes each so far.
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Brad
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #24 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:22pm » | |
I vote for Van Helsing again. And again. And again.
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Doug
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #25 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:23pm » | |
Quote:| (... the idea of an ecumenical monster fighting organization run by the Vatican) . |
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Team Crow would totally kick Van Helsing's ass.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #26 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:43pm » | |
Yes but Daniel Baldwin's belly is no match for Hugh Jackman's wonderful werewolf ass! (I don't care if he is asexual)
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Jon
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #27 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:45pm » | |
Baldwin's vampire hooker banging makes up for a perfectly manscaped lycanthrope glute.
Also, Van Helsing is shit.
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SUCK MAH BIG BLACK MISSILE DICK FAGS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH -- Zealous Carlton. |
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Brad
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #28 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:46pm » | |
Note: When referring to the asexuality of a Van Helsing character, we're talking about extremely poorly-acted, femme Dracula.
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Ta
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| | Re: Which Was Worse? - Part 2
« Reply #29 on Oct 16, 2006, 12:47pm » | |
Noted but the chick was also high on Vampire fumes so it's not like she really would've chosen Baldwin over Jackman or anything. I mean we've all slept with.........never mind.
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